The term ‘love language’ stems from Dr. Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages. In the original book, Dr. Chapman wrote about the five different ways of expressing love to your spouse. Those five ‘love languages’ were quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, and receiving gifts.

While originally meant for romance and lovers, this concept has now broadened itself to self-care and self-love. Finding your self-love language is important for you to understand what kinds of self-care practices bring you the most emotional fulfillment. You can rely on this any time you need, but especially when you want to look outside yourself instead of to yourself. 

How to find your self-love language

Find out which of these five self-love languages rank highest for you.

1)     Receiving Gifts

How to find your self-love language
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How to find your self-love language

The most prominent way someone can show they love you is through gifts, then your love language is receiving gifts. But, come to think of it, how many times do we think of gifting ourselves?

The whole sentence might be laughable to many, and therein lies the issue. We are allowed to pamper our own selves with something nice from time to time. It doesn’t have to be expensive; it doesn’t have to be a big deal.

Just invest your money in something that makes you feel good about yourself. It can be as simple as treating yourself with an ice-cream twice a day.

2)     Quality Time

Spending time with yourself is underrated. We should all have times in the day when we are alone with our thoughts.

Often, the pressure can be overwhelming, and the only way to deal with setbacks is through self-talk and introspection. Look inside and search for the solutions. Practice mindfulness or meditate. You will come out with a fresh perspective.

But that’s not all. Here are some other ideas that you can try to spend quality time with yourself–

  • Go on a solo date or trip.
  • Watch a movie that you absolutely adore.
  • Go on a hike.
  • Journal your thoughts.
  • Go out shopping.
  • Spring clean – organize everything and donate the items that you don’t want.
  • Have a spa day at home.

3)     Physical Touch

You might be wondering how physical touch can relate to self-love. Well, it can, when you focus on

How to find your self-love language
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your physical well-being as well as your emotional it can work wonders.

Get enrolled in some physical activities like Zumba or weight lifting or anything that you prefer. Find out which physical activity gives you the most joy. Start eating healthy and take care of your health. Do not slack when it comes to your physical fitness.

4)     Words of affirmation

This is one of the easiest, most important, and yet often undone self-care practices. Self-talk and positive affirmations are the foundation of self-love. It’s so much easier for us to talk negatively to ourselves, then it is to say positive things. 

We tell others what we admire about them, but how often do we care to pat our own backs on a big triumph? You deserve a compliment from yourself once in a while. Self-affirmations are often needed when you lack motivation. Celebrate your highs and lows with positive words of affirmation.

Here are some ideas for the same –

  • Figure out the positive affirmations that resonate with you and recite them daily.
  • Write a loving letter to yourself.
  • Compliment yourself.
  • Create a vision board to remind yourself of your dreams.
  • Forgive yourself for the mistakes you made in the past.

5)     Acts of Service

love language for yourself
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How to find your self-love language

A lot of you might connect to this particular love language. Doing something kind for others or for yourself can lead to tremendous emotional satisfaction.

Be it donating to a charitable cause, indulging yourself in humanitarian activities, or giving yourself permission to relax, show kindness to others, and to yourself in whatever you do.

So, that’s all from my side. Now, it’s your turn. Find out which of these five self-love languages rank the highest for you. Implement them into your daily self-care routine. Later, come back and share your experience in the comments. 

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