I often think about how so many of us wait for happiness to find us. We spend so much time worrying about things that may or may not happen that it can feel like problems are never-ending. We assume (and hope) that something good will come along and make us happy while we worry our life away. Does this sound familiar? Do you wake up, go about house chores, work tasks, obligations, and responsibilities in relationships like a robot, without feeling any sense of joy? Like you’re rushing to get through each thing so that you can move onto the next, just to continue the cycle? Maybe you’re easily swayed by disappointments and self-doubts, which often leaves you feeling overwhelmed with stress and worries.
Knowing this, you might have taken precious time to pause, relax, and take a break in hopes of sparking joy. You allow yourself to feel unadulterated true happiness. You try to hold on to it and find ways to sustain it. But it doesn’t last and you’re once again trying to figure out what makes people happy so that you can experience it for longer than a moment. Trying to find what makes you happy can be frustrating and confusing. The idea of happiness is different for everyone, so you have to forge your path and define what it takes to be satisfied. So, today I’m sharing some tips and tricks to find what makes you happy.
How to Find What Makes You Happy
Happiness comes in many forms and many ways. It could be a memory of past summers, a good
Thinking About What Happiness Means to You
Sometimes, it’s easy to mold your goals with what you see from other people, especially with social media, where almost everyone projects their lives in terms of images and videos. There’s always the tendency to compare who has more, who has less, and you get caught in the middle of showing your own life. It can be dangerous at times, especially if comparing yourself to others becomes a threat to your mental health. But I challenge you to pay attention to the less obvious things. Ask yourself if what you see is their source of happiness? Are they genuinely delighted? Is that what happiness means to them? Comparison is the thief of joy, and I’m pretty guilty of that sometimes. It’s inevitable, I believe. But, there are ways to go around that.
Think of what happiness means to you. Is it something you get when buying new clothes, shoes, bags? Assess yourself if it’s something you get from being of service to other people to the community or spending time with your loved ones. I suggest that you write it down. Listen to some music and get into making a list of memories that bring you joy. From there, find a pattern. What’s important in life for you? What does your happiness look like based on what you listed? From there, think about what changes you can make in your schedule, lifestyle so you can easily tap your happy thoughts when things are getting rough and tough.
Be your authentic self when doing this. True happiness will only come when you sincerely understand how it truly moves you. Not what other people feel. Just you.
Take Detailed Notes When You Feel Happy
It involves another journalling, but this time, you don’t write anything from the past. You take note
I also suggest that you create a rating system. How does that particular moment fare in your happy scale? Is it relaxed, kind of content, or incandescently happy?
Do this, and believe me that your future self will thank you for making a happy map for yourself.
Remember What Made You Happy as a Child
Let’s go back to your childhood. Some of the things that make us happy now as adults are somehow related to a memory of when we were kids. Do you enjoy strawberry milkshakes? Maybe because it reminded you about your ninth birthday when your mom took you to a diner where you both enjoyed a strawberry milkshake and some pancakes. As an adult, if that memory creates visceral happy feelings, then you can recreate that: a milkshake day with your mom again, or your spouse, or your kids.
We must tap our childhood memories to fill our happy tanks as adults. Kids can be easy to
Create your Happiness Plan
A theory in Psychology called the set-point theory of happiness says that the level at which we look at our wellbeing is based on the heredity and personality we developed as kids. However, another research suggests we can control and set our happiness the way we want it. So there’s no clear-cut scientific law. There are things we can take reign of, and there are those that we can never.
So, it’s time to bring in the planning part. Focus on what you can control and what feels good. Get your happiness plan started. Set up dinner dates with your favorite people, plan for a monthly getaway, schedule visits to a museum or a zoo, or save for a dress you’ve been eyeing for months.
Make Your Goals Realistic
Disappointments and frustrations can get the better of you sometimes. It usually happens when you’ve got no clue what you want to do and achieve, but this also occurs when you have a loaded to-do list, but it’s so long it overwhelms you instead of bringing clarity.
Whether it’s a short-term or long-term goal, build that from what sparks joy in you. What makes you feel happier? When you do it that way, your dreams become more meaningful. It brings out positive emotions such as contentment and a sense of achievement.
Questions to Discover What Makes You Happy
You can use some questions for a happiness journal prompt to help you understand yourself better and find what makes you happy.
- What is your biggest motivation for getting up in the morning?
- What are the three things you love about yourself?
- What is the one place you have always wanted to travel to?
- If you could do one thing without worrying about the cost or practicality, what would it be?
- What is the best gift that you have ever received?
- What is the best reaction you received after you gave them a gift?
- Name someone from ten years ago that makes you smile.
- What are the top three things that make you laugh out loud?
- What are your goals for the next 20 days?
- What are two movies that you never get tired of watching?
Answer these questions that will give you insights into how you view happiness. It’s unique, so there’s no right or wrong answer.
Is Happiness More Important Than Success?
Tricky question, right? There’s no doubt that the two are connected, but does happiness take precedence over success? Consider this: happy people tend to be more successful, whereas success doesn’t guarantee happiness. Happiness comes from finding joy in the everyday things. Success can certainly make you feel happy, but it’s only a matter of time until you’re back to your baseline and working toward your next achievement. All of this supports the idea that yes, happiness is more important than success, but the two are inextricably linked.
We can get so caught up in the daily stresses of life that we often forget to take a pause and think about what matters. With the tips above and these questions, you can start mapping out your ultimate happiness mission.
Recent Comments